We Were All Born Alone

“Born alone, die alone.  No crew to keep my crown or throne.” – Nas

I’ll admit, I was the person who wanted validation for every move I made.  As I got older and began to dig deep into the origins of this shortcoming, I realized it stemmed from my relationship with a family member who thought encouragement was telling me how they could’ve done it better.  This led me to second guess my ideas, goals, boyfriends, etc.  Any life decision I had to make, I consulted with a counsel of family and friends.  How draining is it to answer affirming questions all day? 

That type of nonconstructive criticism still triggers me, but I reminded myself that we were all born alone.  My moves as a single woman only affect me. Other people’s opinions are not my truths, and speaking of which, I need to check the accuracy of my own truths.  So much of what we tell ourselves comes from lies the universe and well-meaning people have told us.  Being confident in yourself and your abilities eliminates the need to seek outside approval.  My journaling sessions sometimes include a list of things I accomplished that day that took a bit of extra confidence to do, followed by one positive mantra at a time.